NEGATIVE COMMENTS

#1 Rule - Play Nice PLEASE!!
#2 Rule - This is not a forum for sales or wanted....please keep it to just general doll discussion.
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Brooke
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NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Brooke » Sat Apr 08, 2017 12:33 pm

Am I the only one here who is ever tempted to make a negative comment or suggestion about a baby someone is making or selling? Sometimes it is so hard to keep my big mouth/fingers shut and I want to say "sweetie, that baby really need to be stripped and redone" or "the lips are way to dark" or "have you ever considered (insert something here)? I mean how can we learn and grow if everyone always says what a darling baby (when its obviously not), how sweet, etc. I would much rather have honest, perhaps negative, comments helping me grow as an artist than false flattery.
I know it is often a matter of personal opinion, but can't honest critical opinions, given with the best intentions, be helpful rather than hurtful? Sometimes I see a doll for sale that is so bad I think people must be laughing behind the sellers back while saying "adorable baby". In my humble opinion that's what is really hurtful.
Am I a terrible person :?

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NadiaK
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by NadiaK » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:02 pm

I understand what you are saying. There have been babies posted here for sale that I have thought were really awful. Some have looked like somebody beat the poor little thing. Yet people will comment " what a gorgeous baby". I personally have a hard time posting that a baby is awful. Guess I don't want to be mean. In these cases I will usually comment by saying what a cute outfit the baby is wearing or something that does not have to do with the actual reborning of the doll. Now if someone posted a doll they were working on and wanted honest critiques because they were learning than that would be different.
Hugs,
Nadia

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Tracy Lorraine
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Tracy Lorraine » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:28 pm

I have to bite my tongue.....uh....my fingers sometimes too. But...beauty is in the eye of the beholder. :toast:
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MariaJose and Zu
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by MariaJose and Zu » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:33 pm

Well, you're not the only one. I'm not interested in reborn, so never see what's on sale or what artists are doing. But I know silicone well and sometimes there are horrible dolls for sale, with grotesque faces or large disproportions in their bodies or nasty faults somewhere in their anatomy, and sometimes I would like to say "it will be very difficult to sell at this price" or comment to the artist that a real baby does not have that type of genitals, for example. But of course I say nothing. If a doll displeases me I say nothing. Or in any case only wish good luck in the sale. But I will never say "beautiful" if I don´t really feel it.

Very recently we have had the unpleasant example that it is not possible to express a sincere constructive criticism without letting the drama unfold.

And besides, maybe people who say that a horrible baby is wonderful, maybe for them it really is beautiful. Luckily in life there are tastes for everything.

:hug:
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Zu, forever in my heard :heart:

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KyleeCat S
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by KyleeCat S » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:42 pm

I have to agree with the responses. I don’t comment that I think a doll is beautiful, if it is not something I think looks beautiful. However, there are different tastes out there, and I figure that even if it's not to my liking, there is probably someone out there who feels that doll is the cutest thing they ever saw. If I leave a "negative" comment, I might dissuade that person from purchasing something that would make them very happy because of the fear of mine or others criticism.
KYLEE


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Mariemay
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Mariemay » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:51 pm

MariaJose and Zu wrote:Well, you're not the only one. I'm not interested in reborn, so never see what's on sale or what artists are doing. But I know silicone well and sometimes there are horrible dolls for sale, with grotesque faces or large disproportions in their bodies or nasty faults somewhere in their anatomy, and sometimes I would like to say "it will be very difficult to sell at this price" or comment to the artist that a real baby does not have that type of genitals, for example. But of course I say nothing. If a doll displeases me I say nothing. Or in any case only wish good luck in the sale. But I will never say "beautiful" if I don´t really feel it.

Very recently we have had the unpleasant example that it is not possible to express a sincere constructive criticism without letting the drama unfold.
And besides, maybe people who say that a horrible baby is wonderful, maybe for them it really is beautiful. Luckily in life there are tastes for everything.

:hug:
Yes that is true. Then we have dolly police saying, if you dont have anything nice to say..... and yes drama always unfolds. :lol:

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DMKreiser
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by DMKreiser » Sat Apr 08, 2017 2:59 pm

sometimes you can pm the person. either ask if they want cc or not . At least that way its private
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Court_LLRN
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Court_LLRN » Sat Apr 08, 2017 3:26 pm

I just wish more people were interested in criticism.
I've learned that if someone does not ask for opinions/criticism, that they do NOT want it. And if you try to give it to them, even if you are very sweet about it, it will NOT be taken in the right way.

I am *very* interested in honest criticism because this is an art that I'm passionate about and always want to learn and improve upon. I suppose when I post a Work-In-Progress picture, I should really word it in the right way to make sure I get true opinions.
But, at the same time, beauty is in the eye of the beholder so it's hard to know which way to take certain criticism.
I can think of several 'top-end' artists whose work I absolutely HATE (you just about couldn't pay me to own it...) and yet they can always sell their dolls for very high prices. So I suppose I'm not the norm... I dunno. :D

And as far as posting on people's threads about their babies... I never lie. If I don't like it or disagree on the things they or other people like about it, I just don't say anything... ;)

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erin1958
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by erin1958 » Sat Apr 08, 2017 4:31 pm

I don't ever say one is beautiful or great if I don't think so. On those, I usually just don't post. If someone asks for opinions though, I do say what I think, just trying to be nice about it if it is negative.
"Wishing You A Happy Dolly Day"
~~ Hugs, Erin ~~

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MikeTheEngineer
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by MikeTheEngineer » Sat Apr 08, 2017 4:45 pm

Mariemay wrote:
MariaJose and Zu wrote:
Very recently we have had the unpleasant example that it is not possible to express a sincere constructive criticism without letting the drama unfold.
Yes that is true. Then we have dolly police saying, if you dont have anything nice to say..... and yes drama always unfolds. :lol:
There is a *HUGE* different between telling someone to throw something they made in the trash and "constructive" criticism. I'm quite certain you're referring to me. I take *CONSTRUCTIVE* criticism quite well. Telling anyone something they made is trash... is petty to say the least. If you think it's trash... just keep it to yourself, as others may like/want it. I've seen dolls on ebay that look like mangled hamburger meat... and they sold. The one I made, with all it's flaws, sold for my asking price. The customer is *quite* happy with it. If it's something small, make a TACTFUL suggestion, if you just don't think it will sell... That's not helpful, just let them figure that out on their own.
Just making "Negative" comments isn't helpful. If someone *asks* for suggestions, use some friggen' TACT. (And I understand tact is a completely foreign concept for some people... if you can figure it out, just keep quiet.)

MariaJose and Zu
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by MariaJose and Zu » Sat Apr 08, 2017 5:48 pm

MikeTheEngineer wrote:
Mariemay wrote:
MariaJose and Zu wrote:
Very recently we have had the unpleasant example that it is not possible to express a sincere constructive criticism without letting the drama unfold.
Yes that is true. Then we have dolly police saying, if you dont have anything nice to say..... and yes drama always unfolds. :lol:
There is a *HUGE* different between telling someone to throw something they made in the trash and "constructive" criticism. I'm quite certain you're referring to me. I take *CONSTRUCTIVE* criticism quite well. Telling anyone something they made is trash... is petty to say the least. If you think it's trash... just keep it to yourself, as others may like/want it. I've seen dolls on ebay that look like mangled hamburger meat... and they sold. The one I made, with all it's flaws, sold for my asking price. The customer is *quite* happy with it. If it's something small, make a TACTFUL suggestion, if you just don't think it will sell... That's not helpful, just let them figure that out on their own.
Just making "Negative" comments isn't helpful. If someone *asks* for suggestions, use some friggen' TACT. (And I understand tact is a completely foreign concept for some people... if you can figure it out, just keep quiet.)
Everything about you and your doll has already been thoroughly discussed.
I'm not interrested in any kind of interaction with you Mike, forget me please ..
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Zu, forever in my heard :heart:

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DollyBabeChris
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by DollyBabeChris » Sat Apr 08, 2017 6:30 pm

I recently made my first doll and posted it in the Artist Showcase area, and got some lovely comments. Trust me, I have a huge list in my head of all of the ways my doll is inferior, what is wrong with it, what I need to work on, etc, etc. I didn't need someone pointing out all of its flaws. But, I was still proud of what I had done and wanted to share. The positive feedback was uplifting, and I so appreciated it. If someone thought "yuck," and kept on going, Thank you! I didn't need to know. Although, I am a highly sensitive person.

There are genres of dolls that I don't care for, and have made comments in the past that I regret. The difference between constructive and hurtful is subjective. I will try in future to fall on the side of kindness, or stay silent.
Chris

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MikeTheEngineer
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by MikeTheEngineer » Sat Apr 08, 2017 6:47 pm

MariaJose and Zu wrote:I'm not interrested in any kind of interaction with you Mike, forget me please ..
Then why are you not only replying, but Quoting me? If you don't want to interact with me... then stop interacting with me. ~_~ :trout: :eggsmile:

Brooke
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Brooke » Sat Apr 08, 2017 7:09 pm

Mike stop it. It isn't all about you. I wasn't even thinking about you when I started this topic.

TinaDolly
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by TinaDolly » Sat Apr 08, 2017 7:22 pm

I have a negative comment... I cannot stand seeing "THIS" and "THAT" in "QUOTES" or ***STARS*** all the time like we are children and cannot decipher wording properly. If you were talking to someone face to face does anyone actually pronounce the words in *** or """" louder when speaking or something? Sorry it had to be said, its agitating to see it in run off paragraphs. IMO. :banghead: :banghead:

chelle77
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by chelle77 » Sat Apr 08, 2017 7:50 pm

I would never tell someone that what they created was awful.
Why would anyone even think that was an ok thing to do??
I have seen a few on this site and other places that I think I must not be seeing what everyone else is gushing over but as far as saying anything ,well,I just don't comment at all
Unless a person specifically asks for constructive criticism I wouldn't offer any~ nor would I feel compelled to
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Brooke
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by Brooke » Sat Apr 08, 2017 8:14 pm

But how in the world are we going to learn and grow in our art if all we hear is how wonderful everything we do is? I guess unsolicited advice can be cruel, but sometimes I see stuff that is so fugly I can't help but wonder what is going on.

chelle77
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by chelle77 » Sat Apr 08, 2017 9:46 pm

Brooke wrote:But how in the world are we going to learn and grow in our art if all we hear is how wonderful everything we do is? I guess unsolicited advice can be cruel, but sometimes I see stuff that is so fugly I can't help but wonder what is going on.
Haha-- I've seen it too
But I can only assume that most people that put their creations out there are ok with how it turned out.... that's why I would never feel comfortable with saying anything without being asked but that's just me :)
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hookedoncrochet
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by hookedoncrochet » Sun Apr 09, 2017 12:05 am

I have seen some very expensive dolls that are really dreadful but on the other hand seen some cheaper ones that are really good, I never comment if I personally think its awful

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MikeTheEngineer
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Re: NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Post by MikeTheEngineer » Sun Apr 09, 2017 3:25 am

TinaDolly wrote: If you were talking to someone face to face does anyone actually pronounce the words in *** or """" louder when speaking or something?
Yes.

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